Nothing Special

Well, I said I'd bring cake.

2009-04-12T13:33:00.008+01:00

I spent the time away from my blog thinking about what it is I actually want from blogging -what I want to say and how I want to come across, yunno, those sort of things- and I've come to a conclusion.

I like some of my posts on here and I love all of the comments you've posted over the year(s, OMG) so rather than delete Nothing Special, I'm just going to move to a new blog. This way I can continue writing but in a more anonymous fashion, for now anyway, whilst still keeping some of my readers.

If you want my new blog's URL, leave a comment and I'll email it to you. After a while I will post the link in the comment section of this post, once I figure out when I'm ready.

Happy blogging :)

Truly Nothing Special.

2009-03-28T00:16:00.006Z

Everything’s gone grey. My least favourite colour. Not even the nice, soft grey that I can tolerate. More the unappealing grey that comes with an outline-blurring, image-distorting mist. It’s creeping over my brain, it’s saturating it and I’m starting to lose myself in the haze.

In the past few months, things that I once found easy or fun to do have become so laborious and difficult that I no longer see why they're even worth the effort in the first place. There’s no drive anymore. Not for drawing, nor blogging, nor working, nor driving, nor even making conversation. I’ve no energy to spare on little things.

Twice in the space of the last three days I’ve almost convinced myself into taking the day off school because never getting out of bed again feels like the best idea I’ve ever had.

The more these days wear on, the more I’m sure it is.

People are starting to notice and comment on how introverted I’m becoming, or how I “constantly” look down or how I’m “constantly” distant or how I "constantly" put myself down. Ironic really as this just makes me feel worse than I probably already do. Ironic too that the word “constantly” is used by them so much. It’s so far from what’s going on that it’s almost laughable. Nothings constant with me anymore.

You’ll find me some days in the library, wearing that smile that makes my face look like a football. I’ll be the Jemma that everyone knows. The Jemma who is madly in love. The Jemma who enthusiastically draws up plans for giant Slip n Slides that involve starting from the roof of her house, to crossing several roads before ending with a complementary doughnut in a park several hundred metres away. She’ll be completely up for building it and doing the first test ride and she’ll make a joke with reference to your mum last night because she just can’t help herself.

Other days you’ll find me sitting in the library, not saying a word. I’ll be the Jemma that confuses people. The Jemma who despite how hard she tries cant make the effort to hide how she feels with the football face smile or crazy idea. She’ll sit there straining her ears whilst she stares in space. Her paranoid thoughts will kick in. Are they nearby? Are they listening to our conversation? Do they hate us? Are they laughing about us? She confuses herself over who “they” are in the library, and she’ll want nothing more than to take cover in the shadows so that no one will notice her and she wont have to deal with it. She’ll desperately want an offered hug because he makes her feel safe and loved, but she’ll refuse for fears of drawing attention to herself. She'll hate herself for this. She’ll do anything to stay invisible. She'll get irritated, even angry, if she can't.

And so it has been going. Rocketing on an extreme high one moment, then plummeting down so fast the next that I cant keep up. I can’t deal with it. It’s got to the point where no longer know how to react in situations, I cant predict my reactions, I cant take things in my stride. I’m paranoid all the time, flipping between happy and sad. It’s relentless and so, so tiring. It’s overwhelming me.

I hate boring you all with my self indulgent wittering and going on. I know for a fact I’ll read this post in the morning, hate it, delete it and replace it with a 6 word one that has more relevance. If you read my blog you'll have noticed that my posts are becoming few an far between anyway, and even when they do appear they are nothing more than a few meaningless words or a worthless photograph. I've been trying, I really have, but I can’t do it anymore.

I’ve lost my direction and so too has my blog, so I guess this is goodbye. I think I need to take some time out and get my head straight. This is only going to get worse if I do nothing about it.

Thank you for your comments and ideas over the past year and a bit, you’ve all made my day at one point or another and encouraged me, which is something truly special.

Thanks too to those invisible readers I have, I’m sure you guys are really nice.

I’ll meet you back here if I blog again. I’ll bring cake.

Ever Get The Feeling They're Just Messing With You?

2009-03-16T19:30:00.005Z

So, I'm standing in Morrisons near the Magazine racks waiting on my mum who's getting lottery tickets at the opposite counter - just standing, looking for anyone I know at the checkouts as you do, when I'm suddenly aware of something tapping me on the arm, "Dear, you couldn't get that Knitting Magazine on the bottom shelf for me could you?" a small voice follows.

It's a tiny, white haired, jam-jar-glasses-dwarfing-her-face old woman, with one bag of shopping clasped in her hand and an over-sized handbag slung over her other arm- obviously I'm in her way.

Now, normally I'd offer a cheery smile and pass her the magazine with a polite "There you are!" without hesitation and I think she expected me to do so.

Except, tonight I had to apologise profusely. Why? Because I happened to be holding a 15kg bag of dog mixer food, that I could barely see over let alone juggle to locate and grab a magazine.

The old woman looked almost hurt as she tottered off (talk about guilt trip!) and selected a round, balding man coming towards her - he was struggling with what appeared to be two trolleys worth of shopping bags in his hands.

Evidently there's a reason Specsavers aren't famous for their jam jar glasses.

You Know You're Failing When...

2009-03-10T23:05:00.004Z

The closest you come to writing your Sociology essay is seeing your teacher in Morrissons.

Guess what happened today.

2009-03-09T21:57:00.012Z

Dear HPV vaccination,

You're currently sloshing around my body -well, I think you're sloshing, you could be surging, flooding or even meandering through my spaghetti veins - or are you in my muscles tissue? Whatever, I don't know, my important leaflet was transformed into a paper aeroplane and I drifted off in that 'informative' assembly.

You feel like you're sloshing. You feel like you've mutated from the tiny needleful you were into an burning torrent that's swelling in my arm. You're being sneaky too - its not even swelling that everyone else can see, oh no. It's hidden, internal swelling that makes me look like a waffling hypochondriac when I stiffly move my arm and wince.

Oh yeah, you thought I'd missed that. You thought I wouldn't notice that the "only around the site of injection" claim was a complete lie. What you really meant was "the entire arm, shoulder, neck and chest" didn't you? Not that I'm complaining, of course. I simply love the prospect of not being able to properly use a fork or tie my own shoe laces for a week.

Is this revenge?

Revenge for my original skeptical attitude towards you? Or the hesitant research I did before agreeing to you? Perhaps I called you the HVP jag once too often...

Something tells me I'm getting off lightly though. Despite your oddly sneaky side effects, you're doing me a great deal of good - you're protecting me against the two most common strains of HPV that eventually lead to cervical cancer.

I realise my painful arms are irrelevant.

You're completely worth it.

Wordles

2009-02-21T00:56:00.002Z

I'm sure you've seen these wordles all over the place, but I've just checked them out. They are pretty neat!

Despite the fact that its focused on my newest posts, I think the jist of my blog is summed up pretty well.

However, I don't mention pancakes often enough. ;)

Oddness.

2009-02-14T18:22:00.002Z

I've been discovering a few things these past few days. Just odd things like the kind that pops into your head whilst you're in the shower that make you pause and think, yunno? Those sorta things.

Like why do when I go to get a tissue from the bathroom, do I switch on the light on my way out - despite knowing that its been off the whole time?

Or like how my name is Jemma. Jemma is what people think of when they think of me, they identify me as the word Jemma. I don't, and that's weird.

Or like how I say yoghurt funnily. Yo-girt.

Or how James and I are so couplsey, we both managed to get the exact same overall mark for the Physics prelim.

Or like how James's mum and dad are hilariously awesome to the extent that they have photos of their younger selves holding monkeys that are dressed up. (No, I don't know either.) I love them. And their son, obviously.

Did you realise Sellotape isn't spelt with a C? Nopes, I didn't either. I've always spelt it Cellotape.

Crazy things that these filter round my head all day, its a wonder I actually manage to do anything else, they're so distracting! I perhaps should write them down in my diary...

Speaking of diaries, I found one I wrote when I was in Primary 6. That's about what, 7 years ago? James has read bits of it and he says I've not changed any, so here's an extract as to what I was doing on Valentines Day 7 years ago. Don't laugh, I was a nerdy little kid :D

"Today I went to music club, it was boring. All they did was sing. Our teacher wants us to perform a play for our parents one day about a fireking and snow. I got the part of a waitress called Daisy. She only says a few lines so it looks fun and Penny's a waitress too. She's called Katie. After that I came home and played my game-boy before having tea. More pancakes! I love pancakes. We then all went a walk with Trouble and when we came home I just went straight to bed."

In other news, love you James!

Because I Love These.

2009-02-07T23:43:00.002Z

Awesome. Just awesome.

It's The Night Before the Physics Prelim.

2009-02-05T20:29:00.004Z

James says:
LOL OMG a units question:
7. One pascal is equivalent to
A 1 Nm
B 1 Nm2
C 1 Nm3
D 1 Nm–2
E 1 Nm–3.
don't like them XD

Jemma says:
i know its something
XD

James says:
hmmm

Jemma says:
like i know we've been taught it but i completely cant remember what it is
im guna guess A XD

James says:
thik it's B
:P

Jemma says:
XD ANSWERS

James says:
:0
it's D XD

Jemma says:
HAHA
OH WE'RE GOOD
XD

Glorious.

2008-12-30T16:51:00.005Z

We're having better weather now than what we did in the summer!

Its not as bad as a few years back though, I can remember paddling in the sea on the 24th and not losing my toes to the cold...

Merry Christmas!

2008-12-25T18:30:00.004Z

Well, that is Christmas over for another yer - insane isnt it? Speaking of insane; my favourite gift 2008. Unusually, it was not one that I recieved this year, but rather one that I gave to someone else.

Now just to explain: we're all pretty big ABBA fans in our house. We've seen Mamma Mia on stage in both Edinburgh and Glasgow, ABBA Gold is perpetually aired in our cars and when the Mamma Mia came out on DVD, it immediately became a family favourite. (After going to see it in the theatre twice, of course.)

So when my granny happened to say that she would love to have an ABBA outfit to wear (another dream of hers is to walk the tightrope on her 100th birthday, she's a bit... eccentric to say the least ) my brother and I jumped at the opportunity to get one for her Christmas...

She hasn't stopped laughing yet.

And neither have we.

Ballgowns and Nail Varnish.

2008-12-18T16:36:00.004Z

So, tonight is the Sna Ba - yep it IS that time of year already - or the Snowball for those of you who don't live in Stranraer. It's only half four but already the days got off to an awesome start, James passed his driving test! Awesomeness indeed!

So all is going well, fingers crossed things will keep going in that fashion and that James and I survive our parents meeting...

Will update later on what hilarity ensues from the Penikis/Dornan shindig, for now I've got my heels to figure out!

Oddly Similar...

2008-12-10T23:42:00.012Z

I think they've been conversing, amidst the rabble of squeaks and barks, about how to appropriately pose for photos.

"Nose forward, chin up and wriggle!"

Frost!

2008-11-30T22:37:00.006Z

I'm just documenting what might be the cloest thing to snow we get this year. Even if it was only frost, it was AWESOME!

December, JD Style.

2008-11-24T16:45:00.012Z

26th November - Girvan Floral Art Demo.

27th - Wigtown Floral Art Demo.
- Make cake for Random Cake Friday

28th - Hand in Provisional Licence thing for driving
- Sort out Bank issues

30th - 4 essays for English due in
- Don't leave to last minute, very bad.
- The Master of Ballantrae - find!

1st December - Ayr Christmas shopping avec Hannah & peoples
- Presents:- Glen, Granny, Dad, James?!?

4th - KAYLEA'S BIRTHDAY!
- Get card!
- Snowball dress!?
- Make cake for Random Cake Friday

6th - Finish mums Christmas present
- Start and/or finish English dissertation

7th - Have mums Christmas present in for framing.

10th - ENGLISH DISSERTATION DUE!
- Moderately panic if no Snowball dress yet
- Find something to wear for 15th

11th - Collect mums present - wrap!
- Wrap as many other presents as possible
- Make cake for RCF!

14th - Survive family Christmas part 1.
- Look forward to family Christmas part 2.

15th - Meal out with friends, 7pm! (I think)
- Take Christmas cards if written
- Super panic if no Snowball dress yet

16th - Prepare for and help at Christmas Fair this week.

17th - Cake for RCF!

18th - SNOWBALL SCHINDIG!
- Survive Penikis/Dornan family meet-up beforehand..
- Get a group photo
- Start the conga, again!

22nd - BIRTHDAY!

25th - CHRISTMAS!
- Majorly enjoy Family Christmas #2.

27th - Enjoy mum being at home!
- Avoid all turkey from now on in.

30th - GIVE BLOOD!
- Enquire about bone marrow.

31st - Chill with family.

(There's also Carol singing, a church service, Glasgow trip and a few other things too - I just haven't got the dates for them yet.)

Actual [worrying] Conversations.

2008-11-23T22:00:00.004Z

Jemma says:
haha well fair enough XD
I'll not bore you with I-Spy
James says:
haha XD
waaaaay too much concentration there
Jemma says:
Okay, maybe just one game because I'm loosing focus and singing this song too much
you can go first, that way you dont have to guess, you just have to go yay or nay :P
James says:
hang on
...
last time we played this I was eating sponge
...
and i'm eating sponge again
*suspicious eyes*
Jemma says:
LMAO!
*innocent whistle*
James says:
STAAAAAAAALKER!!
Jemma says:
my sponge senses were evidently tingling :P
James says:
haha
SPONGE WOMAN!
Jemma says:
TO THE RESCUE!!!
B)

*a little later*

Jemma says:
omg
a marshmallow
YAY
James says:
haha
just one?
Jemma says:
yeah XD
James says:
strange
*suspicious eyes*
they normally travel in packs....
Jemma says:
haha oh no, because I'm Sponge Woman, they're only allowed to legally sell me single marshmallows.
James says:
XD

2008-11-21T18:31:00.006Z

Yesterday I predicted that I'd have a headache after PE - turns out I was so wrong! Due to a Blood Donor talk that took up half of our double PE period, we all headed out to the park for some fun and photo taking for the rest of the afternoon. Oh I know, we skived but whatever, according to the schools register system I've been missing for weeks.

Despite the fact that it was blowing a gale and totally freezing, it was one of the best firday afternoons I've had in ages. School's been kinda hard-going lately, for all of us I'd imagine but today really put me back on track, or at least made me feel back on track which is something I am really greatful for. So guys, thanks for one awesome afternoon. :)

Stolen From Stephen!

2008-11-20T20:44:00.006Z

1. Your ex and you = I’m a lucky person so far.
2. I am listening to = Pink Floyd - Take It Back. Which is great!
3. Maybe I should = Listen to some Meatloaf to indirectly annoy James’s dad.
4. I love = James and watching Frasier. Unequally of course, I'll let you figure out which one goes first. ;P
5. Chocolate is = A nightmare. Darn sugar sensitive teeth!
6. I don't understand = A lot of things.
7. I've lost respect for = A certain few people.
8. I last ate = Ice cream.
9. The meaning of my display name is = My name is Jemma, with a J.
10. God = Is cool.
11. Someday = I will get write my English Disseratation..
12. I will always remember = My time at Stranraer Academy.
14. I never ever want to lose = The people I most care about.
16. Tomorrow I will = Have a headache after PE.
17. I get annoyed when = People forget who I am or forget I exist.
18. Parties = Are groovy.
20. Simple kisses = Are lovely indeeed.
21. Today I = Am slightly bored and severely confused.
22. I wish = I was a little stronger.

IS YOUR / ARE YOU...

23. Is your hair wet?: Nope.
24. Is your cell phone right by you?: Nope.
25. Do you miss someone?: Sort of.
26. Are you wearing chap stick?: Funnily enough, yeah.
27. Are you tired?: More like drained.
28. Are you wearing pyjamas?: Yup.
29. Are you mad?: My english teacher thinks I'm an emotionally unstable mental case, does that count?
30. Are you upset?: Nope.

HAVE YOU...

31. Recently done anything you regret?: Probably.
32. Ever stuck gum under a desk?: Ew no.
33. Ever kicked someone?: Not intentionally.
34. Ever tripped over your own feet?: Oh I do that all the time, I’m super clumsy. Don’t get me started on giant boxes…

TODAY HAVE YOU...

35. Have you cursed?: Yup..
36. Have you gotten mad at someone?: Not really no.
37. have you laughed really hard?: Yes - “Its ‘Vaaybehhrrr’ not ‘Webuhr.’” 38. Is there a person who is on your mind right now?: Yup.
39. Do you have any siblings?: Yup, my younger-but-way-taller brother Glen.
40: Do you smile often?: I have a chubby face, so its more of a constant grin.
41: Do you untie your shoes every time you take them off?: Most of my shoes don’t have laces but on the ones that do I don’t even tie them to start with..
42: Do you like your handwriting?: Yeah, but the fact that I use two different styles of S’s kinda freaks me out.
43: Are your toenails painted?: No.
44: Are you a friendly person?: I don’t think so, but I think I come across as being one.
45: What were you doing at 2pm yesterday?: If I remember rightly I was struggling to remember what Karl Marx’s name was in a massive mental block during a sociology NAB. “Richard Marx? NO! He’s a singer! Think Jemma! THINK!!!1!”

Moments I Dislike; #1

2008-11-09T12:30:00.006Z

On a cold morning, you get into the shower only to notice that whomever was in it before you has used the last of the shampoo and not told you. You then have to leave the warmth and go downstairs wrapped in your towel to hunt for it, shivering because the heating hasn't reached the tiled floor yet. You return to the shower to find it has chosen to mimic some sort of arctic waterfall in the few minutes you took to located the shampoo. You sigh and happen to look down at your hand.

You notice you've picked up conditioner by mistake.

Spanish Umbrollies.

2008-10-27T22:32:00.005Z

Okay, so I actually got back over a week ago from Majorca but my computer decided to give me The Blue Screen Of Death as a welcome home present so I've had no computer AT ALL for the past few days. That in itself is a very very painful experience for a person of my generation, trust me. Very very bad. :P

On the plus side though Majorca was lovely, but check out the photo above to see what kind of weather we had. Like home away from home really...

56 days to my birthday; 59 days to Christmas!

Happy October Hols!

2008-10-09T18:43:00.002+01:00

I'll be back next Friday.
(Armed with stories and photos I hope)

Today was a Sloe day.

2008-10-05T21:55:00.005+01:00

Something we do in the Dornan household is... actually I'm not sure what the right word for it is but I'm going to say forage; we use what grows around us locally in the hedgerows and woodland for preserves and such like things. Does that make sense?

We live in quite a rich area for the likes of blackberries, rosehips, sloes, crab apples and hazelnuts so we've always gone out picking them before turning them into jams, its like a family tradition. From our youngest years Glen and I can remember doing the same thing; a day would start out to be warm and dry so we'd all decide to don our oldest clothes, grab our tubs that had been used when our mum and dad were little, and head out to a quiet place somewhere to pick whatever particular fruit the season offered.

And no matter what fruit it was they were always on the highest, most inaccessible trees and bushes around, who's branches and leaves scratched any visible flesh they could reach.

On blackberry picking days we'd come home with our arms scratched and stung by brambles and giant nettles, our fingertips would be stained blue with the juice from the ripe berries, as were our mouths as we would eat more than we picked along the way - but we didn't notice. Oh no, we were far to excited to see how much we had picked and watch as the fruit bubbled and sloshed in our Granny's giant jam-making pan.

It was all great fun and the same fun we had as kids we still have now. Recently, we'd been trying to source Sloes as they're in season but many of the usual hedgerows had been cut back so there were none around. But thanks to a family friend we managed to find some on the hills over looking Stranraer before Cairn Ryan today.

One rock pile, one high broken fence, one drystone stone dyke and some sheep coupled with the fact that sloe bushes are the jaggiest bushes ever, meant they were pretty hard to get to but we eventually did and we collected 7 and a half pounds of them. Despite that my arms now look like they've been in a fight with a particularly angry cat, it was great. All that's left to do is to prick them all and follow my Gran's recipe to get the Sloe Gin we make every year. Even though I don't drink, its rather good stuff...

For more photos like the one on this post from today, go to the top album on my sidebar. :)

Wordless Wednesday - The Scar.

2008-09-25T07:12:00.000+01:00

A Pleasent Afternoon.

2008-09-23T21:19:00.004+01:00

I'm a fan, now.

2008-09-16T18:56:00.026+01:00

Do you ever have those moments where the importance of what happened at the time didn't really become apparent til ages after? Turns out I have.

Months ago at school one of my everso-exciting PSE classes was covered. (I know, I know, I've not hooked you in on this one yet but bear with me.) It must have been quite a few months ago as it was a horrible, grey morning, (admittedly, that could apply to June...) the schools power had been flickering on and off for most of periods 1 & 2 and the building itself was shaking due to the wind battering against it's glass walls outside.

So, sitting in a dimly lit Admin class at one end of the street, the class was allowed free reign of the computers to look up medical facts a figures - which actually meant seeing who could be the first one on Bebo after getting around the school's banned site block.

However, typing with freezing fingers soon grew too much for many and we resorted to just sitting talking. Our cover teacher was milling around the tables that we were huddled round, engaging in various conversations as he did so. I remember wondering how on earth he hadn't caught hypothermia (he was only wearing a shirt) and trying to place his name - he was new, you see, but I'd seen him around the school in his distinctive white shirt.

The conversation moved on and so did the teacher. Sitting down on the edge of my desk he joined in the conversation about my epileptic Boxer dog - turned out that since moving here, he had a dog with Epilepsy too! We chatted up to the bell about it, he mentioned that he read on a Chinese website somewhere that feeding them chicken and fish helped, so he tried it and it actually was easing his dog's fits.

I left the room still mentally chuckling at the way he had of saying things, his accent and delivery amused me, but I still didn't know his name - something which I didn't find out until last week.

Turns out the teacher whom I'd sat and discussed my dog with was none other than Des Dillon. Yep, the very same Des Dillon who wrote the likes of 'Me and Ma Gal' and 'Picking Brambles', and who writes for BBC Scotland's River City.

As he was teaching at our school, the English Department and their powers of persuasion managed to get Mr Dillon to agree to bringing his new production "Singing I'm No a Billy, He's a Tim" to the town. Us lucky seniors got to go along and watch it this afternoon and to be honest, I'm not sure what I was thinking before it. Here's the description:

What happens when you lock up a Celtic fan?
What happens when you lock up a Celtic fan with a Rangers fan?
What happens when you lock up a Celtic fan with a Rangers fan on the day of the Old Firm match?

Fireworks! That's what!

Follow Billy and Tim, on their journey of discovery. Both have been steeped in bigotry since birth: is it possible for them to change their views? Des Dillon creates the situation, you watch the sparks fly as Billy and Tim clash in a rage of deep-seated sectarianism and hatred. Are you singing their tune?

Now, I'm not a football fan. I don't support Rangers or Celtic and I'm not totally 'clued up' on all of the songs or history of the teams, but the dialogue and story doesn't need you to; I totally enjoyed it. Dillon's writing and story comes across effortlessly to both the football-mad and the football-inept, and the actors involved are excellent. I wont bore you by mincing my words, so read about the play here, and an extract from it here.

So, all you out there, I highly recommend you all go see it if you get the chance! It makes a really good night out, but various places its going are already sold out, so I'm not sure about the avaiablity.

Oh and before I forget, back to my discussion with Mr Dillon about his epileptic dog. His newest book out [that I've ordered] is entitled "My Epileptic Lurcher" for which the synopsis is:

"Manny Riley is a recovering alcoholic and struggling scriptwriter with a serious anger management problem. Lately, though, things have started to change for the better. A happy marriage, a move away from Glasgow to an idyllic seaside village and the adoption of Bailey, a lurcher with epilepsy. He'll soon find that these things only open up a whole new world of problems he'll have to face up to. And he has to do it all without losing his temper."

Anyone else seeing any paralellisms? ;)

Eeek Indeed..

2008-09-14T19:06:00.012+01:00

As Stephen has mentioned over on his blog, the past few weeks at school we've been talking about Universities and open days and everything between those two. Incidentally, due to going to the Open Days I missed my period of PSE so I've not yet been told much about the UCAS Applications and Personal Statements, or what they involve, but from what I have heard, I'm terrified.

Well, okay, not terrified as such; more... intimidated.

Intimidated [a bit like my Guinea Pig above] because a Personal Statement appears to involve having to make yourself sound interesting and worth while to the Uni you are applying to. Now, this may not come as a surprise to you, but my blog is called "Nothing Special" for a reason. I epically fail at talking myself up and at the moment, like Stephen, I'm having trouble thinking of interesting things to say about myself. I don't tend to do anything interesting, and even the things I sometimes do that I find interesting are totally NOT interesting to anyone else.

(This is the point where I stop typing, frown quizzically and the voice in my head asks "Why do you blog then, geek? I'm sure you can think of something.")

So yeah, I'm starting to think about what to write so that when I get to PSE, I'll have a few ideas. Luckily, the trusty Internet is at my fingertips and there are plenty of good examples to be found for helpful tips.

*thinks positively*

Flotsam and Jetsam.

2008-09-05T21:57:00.018+01:00

One thing I really love about round here is all the beaches that surround the area. There are long, sprawling stretches of sand; small pebbly ones, rocky ones, seaweed-covered ones, wave battered ones... but by far my favourite has to be the ones on the western side. Due to the amount of ships and boats that pass between Ireland and our coast, the amount of debris that is washed up is great. Labrax -situated here- is the best example of this and one of my family's favourite beaches for walks. Flotsam and Jetsam [on occasions] make really good looking photos, the following are all from a walk last Sunday - they look better if you click on them. Unfortunately, the weather wasn't great -no sun, grey skies, chilly wind - but it was still lovely.

And yes, that is vertabrae of some sort.

Decisions, decisions.

2008-08-22T19:44:00.009+01:00

We've been back to school for a week now and its just hit me this is the beginning of the end. This will be my last year at school and as if that prospect wasn't scary enough; I'm not even sure what I want to do once I go.

At the moment the whole future thing seems really daunting. Is it just me or is this super big, life-dictating decision fairly difficult to make when you're a 16 year old who enjoys nothing more than obsessing over Thomas The Tank Engine, strawberry tarts and Wall-E?

Course it is. Everyone around me appears to have their idea or their plan or their career that they've always wanted ever since they were 5. Whereas I simply don't. At 5 I'm pretty sure I wanted to be a turtle and my career ideas have changed from week to week ever since. They're still changing right now.

At the start of this blog I wanted to be an Art teacher, I no longer have this inkling.
English teacher? That’s faded.
Journalist? I'd like that but probably not.
Paramedic? Good feelings gone.

I don’t specifically want to *be* anything, and I know that probably sounds odd of me but I cant help it, I am odd and making decisions has never been my thing- especially when its big important ones such as this. Though I am hoping that all this confusion and thinking will be worth it and that one day I’ll wake up and say, “OH THAT’S IT! I’M GOING TO BE A ______”

Pfft, who am I kidding.

Does anyone know how long it takes to become a professional turtle?

Late Wordless Wednesday

2008-08-16T18:42:00.003+01:00

We decided to make Strawberry Tarts today.
I am in love with the sauce.

Wordless Wednesday.

2008-07-16T21:29:00.002+01:00

(It is wednesday, right?)

"Arboreal imagery? I thought they were just poles.."

2008-07-12T21:37:00.014+01:00

As I type, the first week of the summer holidays is coming to an end - quite a scary thought that there's only 5 weeks left until we're all back at school. Though when we go back to school I think its going to be looking rather different. The roof of "the Street" as its known to pupils (the main building of the three) is being taken down and replaced - in fact, they're probably removing panes of glass right now.

I think we've always rather liked the roof, in all its greenhouse-like glory. Despite the fact that it made the school easily confused with a shopping mall, was incredibly cold in winter and incredible warm in summer, it was pretty unique in the area and certainly stood out. As Stephen will tell you, it also looked great empty at night.

I'm not sure what it's being replaced with... Perhaps they payed attention to me after all?

24 Hours and Counting..

2008-07-03T21:14:00.003+01:00

I learned on Monday of this week that every school in Scotland was officially off for their summer holidays, bar us and Fife. How lucky are we, Fife?! It sounds quite unfair and if I'm honest the school work we're doing now doesn't really validate going to school - we might as well be on holiday as for the past four weeks we've done barely any work. Hannah, James and I practically live in the Library where Free Periods are used to catch up with gossip, hunt for proxies, and eat cakes.

Come next year however, remind me how I wasted my free periods in the run up to summer. I'll appreciate it, especially when I leave my Advanced Higher Art Portfolio until the last week before the deadline, like I did at Higher. The portfolio this time being 18 A1 sheets - the equivalent of 72 A4 sheets of paper...

Doomed, much.

Though not much is happening in school, things are quite busy outside the Akademy. Though I didn't get an award this year (hahaha) I went to my younger brother's Award Ceremony on Tuesday; James and Shaun were there also cheering on their siblings and it was actually a fun night.

Shaun and I admired the fake-but-real plants outside the hall, we 'raved' to the music playing, James got chatted up by a policeman, we cheered the Bush-Baby, we cheered the Bush Foetus AKA Christopher, after it had finished Christopher's mum said we could keep him and his 2 little brothers! (I was keen, James not so much..), my family completely left without me - or disowned me as observed by James's mum, James's dad made me roffle with his story about James... and the list goes on.

Note that I'm now calling Glen my "younger brother" rather than my "little brother" as he is now 6 foot tall, making me the smallest of the family at a lowly 5 foot 8.

But things are looking up. Tomorrow is finally the last day of the longest term in history, and I've made a truck load of cakes alongside the army of marshmallow tophats in the picture.

Happy Holidays all!

Summer?

2008-06-25T21:24:00.001+01:00

Orange Lily, originally uploaded by jemma.dornan.

I'm just testing out my new Flickr account with this post, I've been using Picassa Albums and they're great but I thought I'd join the Flickr band wagon for a wee while.

I took this photo tonight whilst there was a power cut (yes, okay, it takes a power cut to get my out into the garden sometimes...) and despite there being a bitterly cold wind bustling about, mum's flowers still managed to reaffirm my hopes that summer is in fact on its way.

You gotta love lilies.

The First BBQ Of 2008.

2008-06-08T22:44:00.006+01:00

What can I say... I'm not actually sure anymore. A comment recently left on my blog has disjointed me a little - despite the fact that I have a fair idea who posted it. There really was no need, but never mind, I've more important things to care about. And I can type properly.

With reference to yesterdays BBQ: it was great! The weather was perfect, the food was good (I hope) and I'm not making any complaints against the guests because they really rock. Seriously you do guys, it was an amazing day so thank you!

Also, guess what?

I MET THE PENIKIS FAMILY!!

Oh yes readers, we got James out of his house and to a social event! Comment if you want to know how we managed it, the story is rather hilarious. I also got to shake Mrs Penikis's hand which was beyond awesome really- I'm sure Stephen can back me up on this.

We proved something yesterday too: Human Pyramids CAN be done by Amateurs. The above photograph on this blog proves such a fact. This next one however, is one of the more spectacularly failed attempts.

Perhaps the failed ones were funnier than the actually successful ones, but the making of them was extremely hilarious. However, neither of these photographs portray the pain the Human Pyramid-ees are feeling today. Our backs, shoulders, arms, wrists, knees, ankles, and goodness knows what else's are sore - but we're not really complaining. It was all great fun.

Oddly enough, the worse case scenario is the same as the best. When a Pyramid fails due to too much spacing or a misjudged jump, you don't want to be at the bottom. Oh no. When you're on the bottom tier and everyone topples on top of you - no one can get up for laughing so your stuck under a giant heap of sprawled limbs, usually in a funny and uncomfortable position.

I'm speaking from experience here, can you tell?

Never mind my thunder..

2008-06-04T19:31:00.006+01:00

Whose stolen my sun?! The past few weeks have been gloriously bright and warm but as soon as I even thought of the word Barbecue the skies darkened and the heavens opened. Oh yes, its raining and has been since this afternoon. Sigh. Things better brighten up for Saturday. I'm just hoping that the marquee Dad and I put up in the garden holds. Seriously, you have not encountered problems until you try and build a marquee without instructions. The suggested number of constructors is 4, the actual number needed should be 16 and even then there would be more poles than hands.

There's a BBQ going on on Saturday you see. The exams are just about all over now for us and I don't know about everyone else, but I'm tired and in need of a change, so Saturday is looking to be a rather nice break. Provided the weather improves, I don't set myself on fire whilst lighting the BBQ and everyone gets here, of course.

In other news, my new 6th Year timetable (of three days) is already annoying me. The school is currently upside down due to builders taking over half of the Street so they can build the new blocks, so classrooms and their teachers have been shifted all over the place. As if this wasn't as confusing enough (trust me, there is nothing worse than turning up at a classroom to find no one there) the school has decided to rename all the rooms so even if I knew where I should be, I've no idea where it is. I hate that feeling, I'm a wee bit OCD on the matter.

Added to that my registration class is on the other side of the school grounds, furthest away from everywhere so I'm late for just about every class first thing. My art teacher has no faith in me. Someones lost the entire subject of RME. My Admin teacher appears to think the whole class is a bit simple - yesterday we learned how to type. With a touch-typing speed of 63 words a minute, it's driving me batty. Fair excited about tomorrow though, guess what we get to learn? How to put a table into a word document! Oh yes, the excitement is almost too much to bear...

Well ne'er heid. Roll on Saturday, and roll on summer.

Pre Maths Exam Terror.

2008-05-19T20:30:00.006+01:00

Ah yes. Right now I'm panicking. I hate maths - with an undying passion. I've never been good at it, ever, and right now I'm running out of revision time. The thing is, the more I stress out about it the more I'll forget so I'm just trying to chill. She says, desperately... However, there is something reassuring about your friends having a group argument over MSN about whether Logarithms are called "logs" or "lins". My friends rock. Speaking of which, Stephen's started a blog! His link is on the sidebar so feel free to go check it out.

I'm off to do past papers now until my eyes fall out or I fall asleep; will report back tomorrow - when I will be 100% Maths free. I have waited 5 years for that. Excellent.

"The word is on the Street that the English paper was brutal."

2008-05-15T16:30:00.009+01:00

Well. I meant to post this yesterday but there was a certain football game going on so I got sidetracked. The part I wrote yesterday is in blue, the rest is from today.

Okay. So here I am. Sat in front of my computer screen talking to a very dear friend who in fact managed to calm my nerves a little just by talking to me, waiting on the game to start with my English revision glaring at me from my bed. Okay, so what idiot put the final on the same eve of the Higher English exam?! Sigh. Could be worse; I could be in Manchester.

Anyway, here's the game plan: I'm going in tomorrow with The Darkness Out There, Infelice and A Streetcar Named Desire as a back up. I'd love it if TDOT came up, questions have been I've been assured its a fairish safe bet. Infelice is alright, I know it well enough to twist it to fit any question. ASCND will do as a back up, even though it wont be great. As for the Close Reading, I cant wait to get that out of the way and see how much I'm relying on the essays. I quite like Close Reading, just hoping its not a daft couple of passages...

I'd best be off., I'm 90 minutes away from making sure I'm all set. Sigh, not feeling good about this exam at all.

Hmmm. You know how when you've worked hard in an exam and then when you come out of it, you immediately forget everything that you wrote? Well I've got that going on. I cant tell whether I've done good or not.. The Close Reading went fine -despite there being a 5 marker stuck in right at the end- and the passages were actually quite good. As for the essay questions... Nightmare!

There were NO questions at all on The Darkness Out There! Thankfully, flicking frantically to the Poetry section, I found a vague question I could mould to Infelice. So without looking at the other questions I barreled into it and 7 pages later I looked at the Drama section. Only one question sounded remotely like something that would fit so I quickly started on that one.

A further Blanche DuBois style mental crisis and 7 pages later, time was up and we left the Dance studio. Funnily enough that was when I started panicking most but I soon calmed down when other said they found it as equally hard and that a few had done the same questions as me.

What I hate most about English exams? I often find that when I'm writing timed essays in class, I usually gauge on how much I have to write by a certain point of a page, ie bottom of the second page for the second factor to start. I can't do this in the exam because they give us booklets that have huge margins and equally huge lines. Its unnerving, if you get me and halfway through I've no idea where I'm supposed to be or how much I've written. Do the booklets need to be like the jotters you got in Primary One? No. It's no help.

And as for the game last night... Well done to St Petersburg.

This Week in Pictures.

2008-05-08T19:46:00.012+01:00

Acrylics and Other Unhinged Things.

2008-04-24T22:21:00.005+01:00

Its currently 22:47. I've just finished my Still Life final piece. I've still got an English essay to write, an art summary to write (or else I die), a physics past paper to do and I'm pretty sure there's something else but I cant think what, so please excuse the incoherency of this post but I felt like blogging. Mainly because of the lovely picture, partly because I want to rant and mostly because I'm pretty sure I'm going insane.

The past few days have been frenzied - well, frenzied for me anyway. In a fever of composition, I've spent my time staying til 5pm after school then working at home until 2am in the morning in a desperate bid to finish my art coursework. Oh yeah, Higher Art ain't all that fun folks. To top that off we got our reports out -two weeks late might I add- which I did promise I'd blog about and I will when I actually find the time to read the thing properly. I seriously want some bottled time off E-Bay. Methinks the general message of the report was that I should be okay with lots of revision and that I'm pleasant to teach. Pfft. Just don't get me started on PE...

On this feeling insane business. I've suddenly developed this thing where when I'm sitting in a class and I'm off in a wee world of my own, I suddenly stop what I'm thinking and panic because I sense that someone is reading my thoughts. It's a horrible feeling of fear. I then force myself to think of something else to throw the imaginary person off whatever I was thinking about in the first place, so I don't look suspicious. Can people read my thoughts? Is this what sleep deprivation results in? Or is this what Higher Art does to you? Who knows. If you do, forward your thoughts to the Inbox in my mind and I'll get back to you.

Possibly the Cutest Photo On This Blog.

2008-04-14T21:01:00.004+01:00

Filler post here guys, just so you don't think I've gone and run off. Just a photograph today, I'm too tired/busy/snowed-under-with-revision to finish a cartoon I'm doing. Will post it when I can. Toodle pip for naoo.

One day, these kids will rule the world.

2008-03-31T19:16:00.010+01:00

Scary thought, right?

Today saw the beginning of a thing we call Easter school. Every Easter from Fourth Year onwards we can give up our holidays to go in to school and catch up on work or pester teachers for exam prep. Personally, I use it to put the finishing touches on my art stuff as I'm always lagging behind this time or year. Luckily I have a great bunch of like minded friends who toddle in too, which makes it all the more fun. There really is something special about a school with barely any pupils in it. Its free and quiet and calm with no little first years running around your feet that you just want to trip up...

Its strange though, this week marks the first year I've been conscious of time. Like, the first year I've noticed go by from beginning to end, sorta like my own personal New Year. Its been a year since I hated English with a passion, a year since we were lazy fourth years, a year since I spilt permanent yellow paint on my arrow keys, a year since i last watched Night At The Museum, and year since I badly burnt my arm on a light bulb. Twice. The scars just starting to fade. Its also been a year since this photograpgh was taken. Its amazing how things change. I wonder if I'll look back on this post this time next year? Its odd to see how much I've changed over the course of this blog and it's not even been a year yet.

Looking at the photo taken today, its funny to think we're all going to grow up one day. There's potential for the worlds best Lawyer, Computer Genius, Astrophysicist, Cosplayer and teacher surrounding that tree. Perhaps come Easter School 2009, we will have taken over the world - one blog post at a time.

Sports Relief!

2008-03-15T23:00:00.005Z

It was our schools Sport Relief Mile on Friday afternoon, and the best thing was we were allowed to dress up! Now, I'll let you into a not-so-secret secret, my group of friends belong in the lower, geekier side of popular. This is actually great because it gives us the drive and ability to excel in Fancy Dress competitions, so we were well prepared for Friday. Well, when I say well prepared I actually mean we had two days to find costumes and get everyone organised. I hate disorganisation.

Luckily, I had had my hair cut the weekend before hand so I had a ready made bob for my character. On the other hand, a pair of knee high orange socks were actually impossible to come by. I even went to a Mall just outside Bristol which has 131 shops in it and couldn't find a pair! I didn't go to Bristol specifically for the socks by the way, we were down in Taunton for two days to go to a family funeral. I did eventually a find a pair though- in my sock drawer, at home. Sods law, eh?

But we did it! Come Friday we paid our £1 and we half skipped, half ran our mile in our costumes. They were a success- even better as we actually made them ourselves (A big thank you to everyone who did! Guys, we were awesome!) It was a great afternoon despite all the running, mud and wind. Sports Relief was officially fun this year. What more of an incentive do you need than to be able to dress up?! I know for a fact us lot were willing to run even more, we should have got sponsorship. I hope the rest of the country have our mentalities and more schools get involved. It's a good cause.

See if you can guess who Stephen, Esme and I were from the photograph above. You should be able to, we won an Easter Egg for Best Dressed. (We look sad because James didn't turn up, I'll let you guess who he was.)

March: Bad Month.

2008-03-04T22:57:00.001Z

If my memory serves me correctly, which it probably doesn't but lets just pretend it does for this blog post, I have a Careers Meeting with the school this month. Generally I fear any meetings with my teachers and parents - see this post - I'm not actually sure why, I just don't cope very well in those types of situations. Could be because my "With Family" persona has to collide with my "With Teacher" persona, which is a really bad thing as I become virtually silent. They usually go something like:

Teacher: "So, Emma.. how are you finding classes?"
Moi- "Uh...Fine.." *nervous shrug, total abandon of eye contact, nod*

Which commences the teacher/parent talk that I just listen intently to, nodding when I need to. I fear this career-themed meeting may be even worse as I don't actually know what I want to do for the rest of my life. I have a fair idea of what I don't want to do, but so far no inkling as to what I will do. I'm actually tempted to say I want to be a Private Detective Lollipop Woman...

This month also sees the delivery of our Reports with our prelim grades. Everyone hates reports, right? I imagine that teachers probably dislike writing them as much as we like reading them. I certainly don't want to this year. If they are particularly funny or in the case of a few subjects, bitchy, I will post snippets on here. So you can all laugh.

Whilst I remember, E-Reports came up in conversation the other day. Does anyone feel this would be a good idea? I think this is alright in theory but I don't know how well it would work. For pupils who knew their reports were terrible, I'd imagine the temptation of the Delete Button would be overwhelming, and also some parents don't have email addresses. However, just because I don't know how well something will work doesn't mean we shouldn't try said thing. Who knows, by the time my kids are in school I could be reading Report Blogs and Skyping Parents Nights...

A Drawing A Day.

2008-02-28T21:08:00.005Z

I've been wanting to start a Picture a Day Blog for a while now but I know myself I'll never keep up with the schedule. So instead, I'm just going to start a blog where I'll post a picture or a drawing or even just a doodle as close to the One-A-Day limit as I can. I think it will be a useful for myself to look back and see how I've progressed- or more likely, not! ;) I'll stick the link in my link bar once I set it up.

I have been changing my mediums lately due to the fact I found myself stuck in the rut of pencil drawings. I like colour, so colour is back on top of my list. Ironically though, tonight's drawing was done on black paper with three sticks of chalk: Yellow, White and Brown. The shoe to the left is far better than the one to the right, don't know why like, but I do apologise. :)

Simply Because I'd Love This To Happen.

2008-02-24T22:37:00.005Z

Personally, I think Idea 4 is the best..

So, yeah..

2008-02-11T17:34:00.000Z

Today was officially the first nice day of the month, well overdue if you ask me. Having done some maths revision we decided we'd go out to the beach, which was great as it acted like a break. So far on the revision front I keep find myself staring blankly at Past Papers whilst a tiny light of recognition flickers in the back of my brain, desperately trying to shine from under copious Du Maurier quotes and song lyrics. So yeah, it was a very welcome break.

These past few weeks there's been a haze over these parts, most notably at night as the glow from the street lamps dyed the haze a vibrant orange making the sky look like a permanent sunset. However, during the day it hasn't been so lovely as it just looks like life's stuck in black and white shadows with no definition between the two. So yeah, today was no different on the haze front but thankfully the sun was shining! Yes, the sun! That big yellow thing in the sky we've not seen for about two months.

So yeah, spurred on from my lack of creativity, I took my camera along for the ride as I was in a photo-taking mood. The result of which I've uploaded into the photos into my Picassa Web-Album to the right of this post, there are a few other albums on there that are better too. Some photos are good, most are bad. But hey, I did learn a few things:
1) It is possible to take stills from the window of a moving car.
2) Pastel skies look awesome.
3) Its a bad idea to run along the beach wearing Etnies without realising you're treading on sinking sand.
4) Wet socks suck.

I think the forth one was the most important one. I have sand between my toes. Urgh.

I'm NEVER dancing in public again...

2008-01-28T20:23:00.000Z

Well I wasn't going to update tonight but, I made a rather hilarious (mortifying rather?) discovery on our schools website. If you head to one of the main pages on the site, Latest News, you will find an entry which says: "21st of December: 2007 Snowball- the best yet?" Which has this horrifyingly hilarious picture attached to it.

Yes. That is Shaun (the one with the kilt) and I (the one in the green) right in the middle dancing like eejits, with a funny looking Tom in the far left. AND its on the SCHOOL website, and now this blog.. ARGH.

Tom definitely came off worse. Only just, mind.

Quote Of The Day.

2008-01-24T21:32:00.001Z

There once was a doodle in this post, and a quote but the risk to my life if it was ever found has just increased ten fold. Sooo, instead you get half the original post and this little blurb here.

Its all good!

Well dudes, other than that nothings been happening. And I mean nothing in the sense that I've had so much to do I've done none of it..

Life in the Akademy?

2008-01-09T19:50:00.000Z

I must apologise, I've not had much time for blogging these last few days, nor drawing cartoons, and I cant remember the last time tidied my room (Yes mum, I know you're reading this, and yes mum, I know its a tip and yes mum, I still haven't found that photo-paper, and yes mum, I love you too.) Anyway, school's been a bit hectic, would you believe its only 5 weeks to our prelims?! Rather doomed with that whole situation. But ne'er heid. Here are some of the things I've been thinking of the last few minutes, and the thing near the bottom is a poster I did for PSE. =]

Things that have been on my mind this week.
·Do you reach a certain age when you suddenly see dust everywhere? And when you do, is there any going back?
·Is the sun frightened of shining over South West Scotland?
·Why do brothers suddenly find a love of drumming and feel the need to practice on every available flat surface when they hit 13?
·Who invented seating plans in school classrooms?
·On that note, who invented First Years?

Pupil Points Of View, Facts About School Life:
·All Art teachers have insane tendencies and short term memories, ie "When I was in Art School, we went to the zoo! And painted pink flamingos!"
·All History teachers have crushes on at least one Historian and one Historical Figure, ie Martin Pugh and Lloyd George.
·All English teachers have lived interesting lives, seen many sights and had many experiences. They also quite often have regal, unusual or literary names, ie Elizabeth, Alexandria.
·All PE teachers are anomaly small and have matching abnormally small feet. (with a serious bad taste in trainers)
·The Science Department regard themselves “cooler” than all the other departments.
·No one talks to the Home Economics Department. No one.
·The Maths Department could be mistaken for a Rick Astley tribute band dressed in Matrix style jackets.
·The supply and cover staff should all be sectioned.
·All Learning Support stall have fetching nicknames and are 32% sane.
·You never see the Librarian enter the library in the mornings nor leave the library at night.
·You can count on both hands the number of times your PSE teacher just hasn’t turned up for class.
·No matter what class you’re in, the whiteboard needs re-calibrated. Twice.
·There is one base where all the best teachers hang out. The Second Year base.
·No matter what time of year it is there is always a broken window somewhere.
·No matter when or where you use a printer, it is always out of paper, toner or even just the will to work.
·The ‘Attention Please’ woman is idolised by all pupils.
·To stop the ever-looming Fire-Alarms-being-set-off-deliberately craze, the janitors place fronts over all Fire Alarms which, when removed, set off smaller alarms. Ohh the logic..
·Pupils are the most uncoordinated, unrefined bunch of people ever.
·The main school building is made out of glass and metal, therefore making it freezing in winter and sweltering in summer. The rest of the school buildings are made from a mix of fluff you find in your tumble dryers and glue, therefore rendering them useless.

Most of those may only apply to the Akademy, as it is a Mental Asylum disguised as a school. Speaking of Mentalists, James has started blogging and I'm sure he'd appreciate a random comment from time to time. Anyway, I must dash, I think I've a Russian History essay to write..

3 French Hens, 2 Turtle Doves and a Graphics Tablet for me.

2007-12-26T22:14:00.000Z

I do hope you all had a lovely Christmas, whether you were in Minnesota or India, and that Santa was goood to you etcetc! I certainly had a nice time, despite the lack of snow. :)

Just a quick blog post tonight, mainly because I would only like your opinion, even if you dont usually comment, on these:

Doodle 1
Doodle2

Let me explaaain. For my birthday this year, my mum and dad got me a graphics tablet which is SUCH a joy as I've been moaning about one for quite a while now. (I'm sure they got it just to shut me up :P) Soooo, I've been testing it out by drawing little pictures of people these past few hours and the two images above are the result. They're not that good, but not too bad. I do apologise to James and Mrs O'Neill though. :)Anyway, concrit would be greatfully recieved.

(PS, I didn't get any French Hens or Turtle Doves.)

2007-12-24T22:59:00.000Z

Merry Christmas

Creative Writing?

2007-12-16T21:17:00.000Z

"It was a crisp, winter's night just before midnight when she arrived unnoticed. The air was silent, save for the chill dancing in the trees, their skeletal branches rustling above her head as her hooded figure drifted quickly across the moonlight path by the river. They had been planning this for months, she thought to herself; every minor detail was catered for in her mind, every move, every noise, every step, everything was to go like clockwork. These thoughts repeated in her head as she made her way soundlessly along the path, slowing every so often to hesitantly listen to her surroundings. Once, near where the river widened, she stop completely and stood motionless in the shadows. Had she heard something? Could she see something hidden in the dense foliage on the river bank? This abrupt pause took no longer than a few seconds before the figure broke into a run, her feet pounding on the gravel path, the crunch resounding in the still air alongside her shallow breathing. The moonlight danced across her figure from behind tree branches and clouds, providing little light as it painted shapes on the the path and glistened on the river flowing beside her.

His presence was masked by the shadows of the building he was leant upon. He checked his watch, the small hands illuminated by the solitary light of a match- it was fast approaching midnight and yet he was still alone. Flicking the match onto the gravel at his feet, he sighed delving his hands into his pockets. With a mixture of curiosity and boredom, he felt the objects that lay within them. His grandmother had always said you could tell a lot about a man from the contents of his pockets; but then again, he though to himself, she was a crazy old dear. His thumb brushed against the rough box of matches, the twines of knotted string, and with male instinct, he couldn't resist jingling his keys. He wasn't altogether sure what his grandmother would have gathered about him from the three items in his pockets, but he knew it would be a different story with the contents of his backpack that lay by his feet. He sighed again, listening to the darkness that surrounded him with great interest. The echoes of a distant highway, the soft murmur of the stream bubbling by, the wail of a nearby alley cat.. they all drifted to his ears. But after a few moments his ears picked up the sound of footsteps upon gravel coming towards him. Footsteps, he knew, that belonged to whom he had been waiting in the shadows for. His fellow criminal's footsteps."

So yeh, me and James are criminal masterminds! But, no, really, I wrote this because I've been thinking a lot about Creative Writing these past few days and how its not really done in English when you get passed a certain level; I haven't done any since the hazy days of First Year and I think its a bit of a shame. I loved creative writing, not that I am/was good at it or anything, but because I love imagining things and depicting it through words. I think its something just about everyone can do -we do it everyday- and enjoy yet its not a major part of the curriculum (there is probably a good reason for this, do let me know what it is) It is a bit late just now, but I am going to look into this further; I got a bit carried away in my imagination above- I do apologise for a bit of a rambling post! :)

Miss Indecisive.

2007-12-12T21:00:00.000Z

Don't you just hate it when people ask you the same questions over and over again, when the answer has been the same for years? Only this year have I noticed how many times I'm asked the same thing,usually by the same people, who just receive the same answer. Mum says its probably because I don't give a satisfying answer, but I feel like I'm living in Groundhog Day. It's really quite amusing sometimes.

FAQs of the week:
"So when's your birthday?"
-"Aren't you 16 yet?"
-"Looking forward to it?"
-"Doing anything nice?"
-"What do you want for your birthday?"
-"What do you want for your Christmas?"
-"Doesn't it suck having a birthday so close to Christmas?"
-"What do you want to do when you leave school?"
-"Don't you want to be a doctor?"

Generally, they come in that order and the answers are always the same. "Before Christmas. No. Spose. Dunno. No idea. No idea. Not really. No, I just like the NHS and medical things. What are you? Mr Flower?!" The thought of making up complex answers has toyed with my imagination for some time now. Sometimes I do succeed and they go like:

-"I'm not 16. I'm 15... 15 years and 360-odd days if your picky. If you want I can work it out in hours, let me fetch my calculator.."
-"I'm totally doing something nice! I'm going to a Lemon Curd factory to try my hand at record breaking lemon curd eating!"
-"Hmm.. What I really want for Christmas is you. No. Only joking. I really really want to go to The North Pole, Narnia or possibly Mars, but I'd settle for Mamma Mia in Glasgow."
-"Well. I want to be a Crash Test Dummy or a corpse in Casualty. Not fussy. Maybe even a BeeKeeper. Or Eddie Izzard's stylist. OH! I want to be a lolly-pop MAN. Yes, Man."

Sometimes its just easier to be irresolute. ;]

It Wont Be Long

2007-12-04T21:01:00.000Z

Yeah yeah yeah!

The countdown to Christmas has shortened considerably since the last time I mentioned it, way back on 22nd of June.. (Yes only I could mention Christmas at such a time of year) and the urge to keep countdowns going in my head has also decreased. I have been keeping numerous dates ticking down inside my head over the past few weeks, the three most important ones being:

17 days to The Snowball. - (Not so chuffed.. Dresses. Hmph.)
19 days to Ones Birthday.
21 days to Christmas.

However, knowing how long it is to an event saddens me. Where I know that it is 21 days to Christmas, I also know that in 22 days time everything will be over. All the hype, all the excitement and cheer, will just be a "remember yesterday?" thing. It is, after all, only one special day of the year. This had made me think that maybe keeping tabs on time isn't such a good idea after all. The more you know, the shorter it seems to be.

I love this time of year- its the Pop Tart time of year: everything's all warm on the inside and all frosted on the outside. (Or maybe I'm just hungry..) December is too my favourite month, not only because my birthday and Christmas all come in the one weekend :) but because of how gorgeous this season makes everything. Even spiderwebs -something I'd rather class as yucky- turn fresh and decorative, bejeweled by the morning frost. Brightly coloured hats and scarves give a real sense of cheer, even if some are slightly garish and only represent the basic Stranraerian dependence on brightly coloured accessories.

This too gives me a real sense of time and how things have changed for the people around me. Thinking back I often lose myself in daydreams of what Christmas time was like for my parents as kids, and even my grandparents. As a child I loved hearing about the snow drifts that gripped our town in my grandads youth, where he was walking along the tops of hedges without knowing because the snow was so deep... Telling and listening to family stories, another part of Christmas we all love.

The mind wanders as to what this years Christmas will bring.

Anti Bullying Week.

2007-11-23T20:46:00.001Z

Glen (my little brother) asked me to help him with his homework tonight. Into his 2nd year at the academy, he had been given two worksheets on Anti Bullying Week for PSE and was stuck with the question:

"If you were given a million pounds, how would you use it to diminish bullying in your school?"

It wasn't just because he didn't know what 'diminish' meant or that he couldn't be bothered to answer it himself, but because he didn't really see how money could help stop bullying in our school. To be honest I had to think about it for a moment too, before we started talking about what he thought the school should do to stop bullying- with or without the million pounds.

Glen has learning difficulties due to him having epilepsy when he was a toddler which means he doesn't really understand things as instantly as what you and I would. (You've just got to explain things to him in a way he'll understand better which, apparently I can do well seeing as I've spent most of my time with him) So, his thoughts on the subject were firstly that they should take all those classed as bullies out of schools and either shoot them, or "wheck them all on a desert island." Maybe a bit too harsh Glen I said, and encouraged him away from the violent, extremist actions. Quickly.

About ten minutes into listening to him and talking with him, it soon became clear he'd been paying attention in class and had made up his own mind about what schools could do if encouraged to stop bullying, which is great. He suggested that schools make seniors into buddies to help kids who were being bullied, and bullies could take part in workshops that would make them see how wrong it was- with use of the million pounds. The fact that Glen knew what could be done meant that teaching kids through Anti Bullying Week was actually successful in raising awareness for the cause.

We both agree that bullying is a horrible thing and that its about time teachers in schools were given back the discipline and respect they had once upon a time to deal with bullies accordingly. Maybe not as severe as shooting them on desert islands but enough to prevent as much bullying in schools as possible.

I left him to write up his own answers earlier and he's just given me the sheets to check over. Halfway down one page lies the question: "Have you ever been bullied in school?" to which he has scribbled underneath, "No, my sister does enough to me at home. ;)"

Siblings. You just cant win.

Children In Need 07.

2007-11-16T23:48:00.001Z

Today was Children In Need, something that comes round the same time every year. To be honest, the day was alright; or to put it another way -things could've been worse. Events included Staff V Pupils football, Bake Sales, Face Painting, Alternative Miss World, Stranraer Academy's Got Talent (don't laugh..) and a non-uniform day. Major frivolity all round, and for a good cause too.

Something that overshadowed the day for me -but also made me smile a little- was the enormous sense of time I suddenly became aware of. Everything that was going on tripped me up and took me back a year to CIN 06. I can remember everything that happened that day and it just shocked me at how quickly a year can go and what changes it can bring. Also the fact that something is always changing, nothing stays the same for long these days.

If someone had said to me back in 4th year that a year later my Art, English, Physics, CDT, PE, Computing and German teachers would all be long gone, I'd probably have laughed. But with time brings change, and change.. well its just something I've got to embrace. Even though I dislike it.

So, I've spent most of the day with my thoughts in the past, remembering all of this made me think of how many changes the school has undergone in the last 365 days. For instance: Last year, Mr Kitson won The X Factor. He was an English teacher who played the guitar well, and who often misplaced his two front teeth. The face of the English Dept changed dramatically after he left. This year, a Mrs Foreman won it. She's the newest edition to the Home Economics teachers, and she's from Jamaica.

Most all of the teachers were missing from the line up of last years concert, and most of this years I didn't know.

Strange that.

This years wasn't as good.

Parents Evening...

2007-11-07T20:33:00.000Z

Ah, those two words that strike fear into every school pupils mind. It was mine tonight. I must admit, I was feeling a bit apprehensive with tonight's round of appointments as over the past few weeks I've felt my attention span wane and my focus go to pot. But as the evening progressed, the comments remained the same as they have done for the past 5 years, as did my views on them. Summarized, tonight's included:

~Art: "The first thing I remember of teaching Jemma in 4th year was when I strictly told her not to rip up her 6 months of work and start over with 2 months left. Of course, she went and did it anyway, and got an Int 2 A. That's talent coming through. She has talent, something you need to get through higher, and she will."
Uhhuh. I'm sure. My work is utter rubbish IMO. And he so made me sound mean, I wasn't, honest. I just wasn't happy with it so binned it elaborately. Its art, how can it not be coool? :D

~English: "As you know I didn’t have Jemma before the summer, and I’ve come to terms with the fact I’ll never fill the shoes of her Total All-Time Favourite Teacher. *grin* But I think I'm sorta getting there. It was touch and go for a while, yunno like, which I can quite agree with as dear old Liz was a fantastic colleague. I mean I loved the ground she walked on, yunno so."
I've forgotten the rest of what he said as I spent too much time trying to remember what it was he was saying. There was something about all teenagers being weird and that Lara and I spoke in code. Also that he's only sent three emails in the past ten years. I think I'm doing okay though, he's a cool teacher. And Mrs O'Neill, sounds like you've got an admirer ;)

~History 1: "Other than using more Historians quotes in her essays, Jemma is very capable of getting a good pass at Higher."
The rest I forget as I was so astounded she got my name right. Despite the fact I've had her for 4 years now. And despite the fact she taught my mum when she was my age. She likes my doodling though, creative doodling is alright she says. Rock onnn.

~History 2: "Quietly efficient, but sometimes too quiet. I think Jemma you wrote it on your progress sheet that you needed to add more in class and I agree. You need to work on it."
Yes, this has been the same thing on all my teachers lips from 1st Year. I hate answering in class unless its on a subject I feel strongly about and I am sure of myself. Such a time has only happened once; in English before the summer on the subject of Daphne du Maurier, I know all there is to know so I'm okay with it. Plus the class rocked.

~Maths: "The most quietest girl in the class, *smile*, but always has been and I'm sure always will be."
Yup, too right. That's not changed in five years. Curse me stupid quietness.

So after that I'm left feeling sort of... disheartened with the whole thing. On one hand I'm capable of getting good grades in the next year. On the other hand, am I good enough, willing enough, to get them? I'm too tired to think tonight, which is probably the root problem with my unusual negativity, maybe in the morning tihngs will be looking up.

Where have all the teachers gone?

2007-11-03T18:13:00.000Z

Yesterday I said goodbye to the last of my favourite teachers. Mr Bennie left the CDT Dept on Friday for a school half the size, with double the size of CDT Dept. I cant blame him for leaving, our department has been running on one teacher most of the year now and it really was unfair on him. Not only was Mr Bennie having to take on more work, but the pupils were missing out too.

Overall actually, our school is running on minimum teachers at the moment. As mentioned here almost every department is suffering due to short term and long term absences, job applications that no one turns up for... Its almost as bad as when our headteacher position went without anyone putting in for it. Surely situations like this is when blogs really can come in handy? If a teacher is going to be off for a long period of time due to illness or whatever, I'm sure they could easily access their computer and leave course notes for their pupils back in school.

Personally I think it'd be a great idea. At the moment I have no art teacher and my work rate is sufffering heavily, the class on a whole has missed its deadlines by weeks and my art study sheet lies empty. I know that if it wasnt for the fact I find writing essays on art fairly reasonable (dare I say I enjoy them?) and I'm able to research at home I would have no chance come exam time. But without a teacher, most of the class arent doing any work at all, in class or at home.

Clue blogging idea screen left. Our actual teacher whilst absent could then upload useful links, reinforce our deadlines (theres something about our cover teacher that no one can take seriously...) and generally keep teaching us over the internet. This way we wouldnt miss out too much as sites like Mikeys school's would mean we could have an "online classroom" so to speak.

Or maybe, just maybe, we could find some actual teachers?

Halloween!

2007-10-27T23:11:00.001+01:00

Finally! Well, four days early but still! Tonight we all had a party at my house, by all I mean all in the above photo, in left to right form.

Bottom Row: Lara Harvey (witch), Hannah McClusky (Evil fairy queen), Me (Marc Bolan/ Drunken Business Woman avec Feather Boa), Stephen Brown (Policeman).
Middle Row: Roslyn Campbell (Evil fairy), Zanda Knight (Zandette), Tom McColm (Harry Potter-esque), Shaun Corbett (Superman!), Hazel Brown (Shaun), Phil Holmes (Pumpkin), and Laura Monteith (Goth).

As you can tell from the photo we had a hilarious night! The picture looks like its been Tom and Zanda's wedding and the rest of us are the wedding goers though. Future premonition? I think not. :) But still brilliant! The rest of the photos are viewable by clicking on the wee box thing to the right of this entitled Halloweeen.

Well I have nothing else coherant to say as I'm rather tired -seeing as we did walk in the cold dark night all the way to Mr Keery's only for him to not open the door- and it is... twenty five past eleven. Dear me. I need to get out of my costume. Night!

Techno-Joy or Techno-Fear?

2007-10-21T11:05:00.000+01:00

Well I'm back from my holidays, had a great time and now I've got school to look forward to. Ahem. True to form I've been thinking a lot lately about technology and education, and how different my classes could be if they moved on with the times. Blogs are becoming more widespread, their even cropping up on Casualty.. But as I was saying education and technology. An odd combination for a lot of teachers, or at least rather limited.

I find my school to be quite lucky in the technology department, every class has a whiteboard and every teacher has a laptop. Yet, they are rarely used for anything more than Power Point presentations and EasyTeach files that are so outdated the software struggles to run properly. With new programs like Skitch and Scratch wouldn't it be great if pupils were allowed to make their own learning shows? I think it would, as a pupil I know it takes fun things to motivate me into learning. The availability of new programs is immense out there, why should we have to stick to whats tried and tested? Are we really that un-daring?

The answer is probably yes. And really, in a way, there's nothing wrong with that. Like Eddie Izzard's TechnoFear and TechnoJoy, I know some teachers aren't quite comfortable with using computers and would rather stick with tried and tested ways of teaching. Added with the continual bad press the Internet gets, there does seem very slightly chance of progress.

Take my grandparents for instance. I asked them this afternoon what they thought Bebo, MySpace, FaceBook and MSN were from what they'd heard about them. Their responses were slightly typical of what most "older" people think of the Internet, the usual fears of kids safety etc. Sadly, all this negativity, which I guess is common place, prevents the great opertunities the internet has created being taken in full value.

This in itself isn't suited well to pupils in schools today. We've been brought up on computers and therefore skip and in a way underestimate the hidden dangers present on the web. We dont have this everpresent fears of people not being who they say they are, downloading, broadcasting our opinions for all to see, or even clicking on random buttons in the hope it sorts your problem out. (Speaking from a bad personal experience where I'm sure there was smoke coming from the back of my tower...) But we are aware of them and have a knowledge of the way the net works. Its not like 40-odd years ago where hardly anyone had access to computers, everyone now has at least 2 in their home. So surely these skills should be amplified and further built on in schools?

I should hope so.

Spanish Inquisition

2007-10-14T18:10:00.000+01:00

Well, here I am sat infront of a hotel computer in sunny Menorca, watching my online time tick away in the corner of my screen. I have 8 minutes 45 seconds left apparently. Must press on.

May I just warn you that there may be random spelling and grammatical mistakes as the keyboards are of a Spanish nature and I still haven´t found the question marks. Although, they do have a rather fetching upside down interrobang that is on a key shortcut I cant quite reach... ¡¿ That´ll do.

I´ve been in Spain for just a few days now, and I love it already. Everywhere you go the people are far friendlier than what you get back in Scotland. Maybe because its sunny and they have sunny dispositions to match. (Hence the depressively rainy attitudes of us in Scotland?) ;)

Another thing that struck me is that when we´re out having a meal or a drink in a restaurant, it is still legal over here to smoke. I guess I´ve been so used to it over in Britain that it was quite surprising and novel to see. Being a very anti-smoking child I guess I was just a wee bit peeved.

Is peeved even a word? I´ve repeated it inside my head so many times that it now seems silly. I will check, when I get a decent computer and keyboard.

Also, I´ve become all to aware of my own accent recently. Very self conscious when talking as I find myself saying things like, "Huvnae" "Cannae" "Faffed" "Ocht" "Ken" and I´m sure I say "Aye" every second word. Its probably because I´m used to everyone else around me sounding equally stupid. (Luv yas reli)

Rebecca and I have already made friends with a few of the locals, like El Spanish Dude (we haven't yet learned his name) who -whilst I was snorkeling- flung bread in the water so the fish wold attack me. Good job I can swim. Fast. He´s really cool though, he says "Ola" to all you reading.

Oh gosh, only a few minutes left. *superfasttypingmode*

*Happified squeal* I´ve been catching up on everyones blogs before I came on to quickly type this and, thank you to Mrs O´Neill for mentioning me on her blog. Never been recognised for doing anything ever before. At least not under the right name. How bien! I think.. Spanish isn't that good, watching Dora the Explorer does not count as good language skills...

Well I only have under a minute left so this will have to be cut short. Will resume blogging with pictures when I return, hopefully with a tan too.

Sol.

2007-10-09T20:03:00.000+01:00

I'm still fixated with Halloween but I'll leave it out (mostly) for this post as its a rather quick post. Its the second day of the October Holidays and already my mind is numb. So numb in fact, I read my horoscope today. I rarely do unless I'm really bored, but when I do I do find them somewhat interesting. Todays reading for Capricorns everywhere is:

'Zip-a-dee-doo-dah, zipadee-ay, my-oh-my what a wonderful day...' Remember the old Disney Song Of The South? The best version of this that you'll ever hear is by Steve Miller on his much underrated album, Born 2B Blue. I'm mentioning this to you today because, well, you decide. Because I want to talk about music? Or because 'plenty of sunshine' actually IS coming your way. Venus is forming a conjunction to your ruler. That's the truth. It's actual. Soon (almost) everything will be satisfactual.

I find this quite funny as I'm off to Menorca -possibly Majorca, I get confused easily- in two days, which explains the sunshine (I hope). I also have been talking about music and Disney a lot recently, see the post below, which ties in too. Happy coincidence? Most probably.

Anyway, seeing as I'm off into the sunshine soon, this will be my last post for the next week at least. However I hope to return with some good pictures and blog topics other than Halloween. Also I'm taking my sketchbook with me which no doubt will feed my fasination with the sky and rural countryside at the minute. Hence the picture above, taken from Innermessan (sp?) the other week by my trusty telephone sidekick and I.

Oh! how silly of me, I forgot to type in "Popular Ned Language" today. Tsk, I shall leave that for a rainy November day. I've been doing my research y'see, as much as it pains me to do so, but I want to do a wee social-type experiment.

How do you think "picture" is apparently spelt?

"Dont you lot use the internet for anything educational?"

2007-10-01T19:52:00.002+01:00

This was the interesting question posed to my history class today by Mrs H. The class' reaction was as expected, to her surprise, with comments like, "Unles Bebo and MSN are classed as educational, no." -- "Not unless I have to." and possibly the worst, "Ocht naw, dae ah look yen on thaem brainy folk?"

This sent me into a blog-post-purpose day dream for the rest of the lesson. What do I do on the Internet when I spend hours of my free time glued to the screen? What do other people my age do? Could teachers use the internet as a way of education? Of course, the answers to the first two questions are easy.

1)I usually send my computer into hyper-drive by opening far too many windows at once and carrying out numerous tasks simultaneously. In other words; I chat on bebo, I upload pictures from my phone, I download music onto my MP3, I discuss on one or two forums, I share conversations with many different people over MSN, I potter away with my blog, I listen to music and more often than not my Photo shop is running in the background making some form of pixel-art. There's the odd homework task in the mix too.
-Educational relevance? Not much.

2) Most teenagers at Stranraer Academy (not including the PGs as we are indeed in a league of our own, Shaun will explain if he comments :P) spend their online life worshiping BEBO and MSN, and would willingly admit so. This includes; racing to get the latest skins, newest tricks and tips, newest versions, the first to have an original name or the most "loves." This is normally done by talking in the worst language ever known to man- where vowels don't exist, punctuation is overused and the idea of capital letters is but an urban myth. Do they realise how bad grammatical and spelling mistakes look online? No. IT ISNA3 KWL TA3 TAK RYT!!!1
-Educational relevance? Not much.

The third answer is rather different. Both the above answers wouldn't come under the "education" bracket for most teachers in school, including Mrs H, as stereotypical educational use of the Internet is researching a topic elaborately using as many pie charts as possible. But, in my opinion, I feel this could be changed. The Internet is a vast network in which there is so much to learn from, giving the right tools to access it, and could well be turned into one of the greatest teacher-helping pupil-friendly textbooks ever.

Introduced to me by Mrs O'Neill, Wikispaces and blogs are but two of the ways schools could get a little bit of technology into their classrooms -provided they have the know-how and the willingness to do so. I personally find this to be great, as its far more enjoyable than copying out of textbooks. They would allow more for kids who are absent or if the teacher happens to be absent or even just in fun homework tasks, to adapt to learning in different media and environments.

Our school however, appears to be stuck in the days when PowerPoint presentations were the best and only way of teaching. Maybe one day things'll change and ideas about interactive school communities wont just be resigned to History period day-dreams.

[Of course, being one of those quiet invisible type of people sitting in the back of the class, I didn't refer to any of my ideas about what the Internet could be used for in this certain class, for four reasons; 1) The fear of having to answer that dreaded question, "What's a blog?", 2) Getting quizzed on what I post on my blog, and 3) I have a fear of anyone else finding my blog.]

My WeeMee's got style.

2007-09-23T13:00:00.000+01:00

I was going to redo my FIVE THINGS ABOUT ME thing tonight but then I realsied, there really aren't that many things that are interesting about me. I'm a pretty dull person. So instead, I figured I just post one random fact about me. So here it is-

--A few months from the start of the year, I set myself the challenge of learning Sign Language. I'd stopped and started along the way, what with exams and other distractions but I took it back up propperly over the summer and now I'm almost fluent, give or take a few words. Best part of it is that I can have a conversation in class and noone except Lara knows what I'm saying. Its great.

Or maaybe thats just me being weird.

Anyway, as per usual I have a ton of things to do but have managed to find something to distract myself. I've given my WeeMee a room, an umbrella and glasses. How cool. If you're reading and you have a WeeMee leave me a message as I'm message-less. I've also uploaded a few pictures into my Picassa album, viewable by clicking on the swan thing to the right of this. Andd, partly due to Shaun shouting, "HELLO MRS DORNAN!" at my mum every time he sees her, I've created a blog for her. Its a bit.. empty at the moment as she's not posted yet but I'll soon change that. ;)

Music change today. I originally wanted Marc Bolan- Hot Love but its not hosted, so Metal Guru will just have to do. Hard to think he's been dead for 30 years already this month. Also shockingly, its only 19 days to my holidays, 95 days to my birthday, and 98 days to Christmas. Not that I'm counting..

One of those days?

2007-09-19T19:10:00.000+01:00

I'm going to do what I do best- grumble and discuss the weather. Every month of the calendar year seems to have its own seasonal personality, to which we abide by during the weeks they contain. Clothing styles change with the weather, the colours change, the clocks change and our anticipation changes depending on what we're looking forward to. Reading my blog, you've probably noticed I'm a very visual person, most things in my life are associated with certain colours- like a human Mood Ring per se. So, I've been thinking, (s'becoming a habit these days, I'm getting worried) of what my year would look like if someone was to compose it visually.

-January and February are the bleak months yet they are filled with hope for the future year too. These are the months everyone is still singing from Christmas and looking forward subconsciously, with little spring lambs frolicking in fields of glistening snow drops. I think its best represented by cool blues and mint greens, like the coolness of toothpaste..

-June and July feel the warmest and brightest, when schools gearing up for the holidays and the atmosphere is happy. Summer sun, ice creams and adventuristic days at amongst every child's hopes (and expectations). Most likely to be represented by reds and yellows, which reflecting in both the heat and the energy levels presented in these midway months.

-September-October time is the transition into the cooler oranges, muted pinks and browns. I find this time of year to be both glorious in colour yet, personally, really really.. muted. Like, there are barely any big holidays to celebrate, other than Halloween -which in itself gives off a dark tone- and its the time of year when I start to lose all sense of everything and just feel perpetually tired, for no outstanding reason.

-November and December pick up the pace again as the build up to Christmas is on the horizon. Scarves and hats are dug out of cluttered drawers, Christmas decorations begin to take over the house and the only thing on TV is The Great Escape. (Maybe one year they'll surprise us by not escaping..) The nights become darker and wintry, where the only good thing to do is snuggle up with a good book and hot chocolate- great! I love winter. Everything happens in December for me; my birthday, then Christmas then New Year and not to mention the reflective days where all you do is talk about whats gone on over the past year. It can surprise you what can change, what you don't notice as you're too busy looking ahead.

I had one of these days today. A December day in September, (maybe Global Warming is creeping up on us) where the weather became instantly cold with a biting wind and all I wanted to do was think back to the summer and warmer times. I suppose its a sort of comfort thing, talking about what has been rather than face the future, I do it far to often- mainly in maths when I'm invisible.

The thought of Global Warming rather alarms me. I'm not a huge fan of change, even though I believe change is a good thing, and slowly but surely even I can see the effects we're having on this planet. Pretty soon, the weather system and our yearly calendar will undoubtedly change, and I cant say for the better. So far, we've had extreme flooding in the Midlands and Tornadoes in London;- it wouldn't surprise me if next Belfast was turned into a swamp and Scotland was ravished by spontaneous hail stones the size of coconuts. Well, maybe I'm exaggerating a little, but the weather's become so unpredictable not even my blog can control it.

Is there much we can do? Does obsessive recycling hold the answer, or even do enough? I suppose we'll just have to wait and see. Maybe when I'm having a barbecue and beach party on my birthday will everything make sense.

Judging Books By Their Covers.

2007-09-12T18:01:00.001+01:00

In English today we started reading through the first Short Story I've studied in a very long while; "The Darkness Out There" by Penelope Lively. I like it so far, I'm an analysis-aholic as it is anyway so I'm intrigued at the prospect of studying it thoroughly. This, surprisingly, got me thinking: What is it that makes us read what we read?

Personally, I throw caution to the wind and often chose books by their covers. They intrigue me, I fall hook line and sinker for the advertising companies who design the covers in the first place. Maybe its just my mindset, or.. something but if I notice an interesting cover, I’m most likely to read the book. There are other reasons, obviously, like the author or raving reviews that I like to make my own decisions about but added with a great cover usually is a recipe for success.

Strangely though, the Daphne Du Maurier books don’t have very interesting and detailed Terry-Pratchett-like covers, yet I’m an avid reader. I like their simplicity. The plots and characters make up for this once you get reading however. (The narrator in Rebecca has my full sympathy, for obvious reasons.)

I'm a sucker for cover art, Terry Pratchett's being the worst. Or the velvety covers of children's books by Debi Gliori. Or those uber cool Pop-Up books about pirates and dragons... Anyway. Here are a two books that have caught my eye whilst blogging here:

<Hopeless Romantic by Harriet Evans. I think the simplicity of the colour and shapes in this cover is what I like. Pink umbrella FTW. Haven't read the book yet, so I cant comment on whether I can judge a book by its cover successfully.

Going Home by Harriet Evans. Wintry and Christmas-y, portrays the book superbly. >

They're both rather intriguing covers, I'm tempted to read A Hopeless Romantic already. The books that feature in my picture in the top of this post are just a selection that I love- especially The Interpretation Of Murder. Good books in my books anyway..

Sending Out An SOS.

2007-09-01T12:34:00.001+01:00

Just a quick update today as I'm rather taken by a creative writing idea I've just decided to pursue- shall post more details once I get parts written. The outcome should hopefully be really really weird and funny and hopefully a good read (provided its legal of course.) Its set in Stranraer Academy aswell. (Says it all really dunnit)

I'm in the middle of trying to persuade my mum to write a blog post on here as she's just recently switched jobs and become a Learning Support teacher at the Academy, she has been for the past three years but now she's full time. I think it'd be pretty interesting to read. And make a change from mum reading all my posts. :P

Change of song today: The Police & Sting- Message In A Bottle. Incredibly catchy and I like itt.

Must get back to my plan before I forget everything thats in my head. More on the story later.

Pet Hates.

2007-08-29T18:24:00.000+01:00

Now back at school my rate of daily conversation has increased. I know that sounds terrible, but at school you either learn, talk or... skive I suppose. Well, there are a whole lot of things you can get up too in Stranraer Academy but I shant say what. ;) The conversation at lunch turned into one of Pet Hates, and I got really interested so I've carried it on to my blog. I was also tagged to do it by my "Irish-Buddy" friend Kathie who wont let me link to her blog for some odd reason. Lolz.

Pet hates. Some of my pet hates dont really sound like pet hates, they just sound fussy. But heyho. I have several, as follows-
- The most obvious one, the "conspiracy" surrounding the spelling and mistaken identity I have with my name. I would love to change my name to something unforgettable like Sacagawea... Jemma really isnt that hard. Is it?

- I really dislike it when old people stand in the middle of the street and talk about how many times they've had their hips replaced. I also find it humourous so I'm not sure this one counts. Plus, I'll be old one day... Muwhahaha. *pensioner from hell music*

- In school, the craze of wearing luminous orange/green/yellow bangles, belts, shoes, hairbands, earrings, eye shaddow and beads. Really, there is no need for it unless you happen to wander the streets as a late-night Lollipop Woman.

- The same people mentioned above spelling words in the new "Ned-ictionary." Words including: Awryt, bbz, plz, hu, laffs, tht, fanx and wuu2, the list goes on... If thats not bad enough they bombard you with copious amounts of xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx's at the end of each sentence. Do these people have no concept of how bad spelling and grammatical mistakes look online. *despair*

- Push and Pull doors. There's always that moment of confusion in your mind when you're not sure whether to Push or Pull but you also dont want to look like an idiot when trying to find out. Or maybe thats just me... [Wouldnt that sentence be hillarious if taken out of context? ;)]

I dont have as many pet hates as I origanaly thought.. Wow. Well, its an open tag, apparently so feel free to participate at your own will.

Drawing of the week, the only drawing of the week as I'm at war with my art teacher, is my one of my favourite food other than Lemon curd. Jelly.

I like brightly coloured things.

Brightly coloured jelly-tastic things.

Which is why my next picutre I plan to put up here will be awesome. I hope anyway.

THINGS OF THE MOMENT-
Song of the week: ELO- Calling America. I adoore it.
Quote of the week: "Yeh, rhythm and rhyme, like Lemon and Lime. Innit."
Poet of the week- Stevie Smith (Infelice and Our Bog is Dood)
Food and general Everything Of The Week- Awesome Ice cream sprinkles. S'love. :)

Its 10 oclock. Offically the latest I've ever left an essay. Excpet that time I woke up at 3am and remembered I had one on the Identification to write. That was a silly moment. Must be off!

Back to School.

2007-08-21T18:13:00.000+01:00

Well that's summer 07 over. Usually that comment would be followed by "and what a summer its been" but this year its not true. The weather has been non existent of anything that could be classed as Summery and the school holidays were far too short. Not that I'm complaining...

The first day of school was Tuesday, and I'm so glad its over. Everything was alright -I had slowly gripped how to use a pencil again by 4th period- and classes settled in quite quickly. Wednesday was pretty much the same, and the influx of new teachers is incredible! But at least it means we can get taught now..

Howeverrrr.

Mrs O'Neill has bravely left the English Dept, Stranraer Academy, in search of an educational adventure in Minnesota! As Shaun has beaten me to, we do wish you the best of luck in your new job and for your future Mrs O. Even if you're veryveryveryveryvery muchly missed. Do enjoy itt! And do keep us up to date with your blog, when you find the time in the 7 hour time difference that isss.

Our English adventures have come to an end. Alongside Mrs O'Neill leaving -which was veryveryvery... (okay, I'll stop with that now) saddening- I have been moved into Mr Keery's class because of my exam result, leaving Laura, Grant and James in another class. Its all gone to pot I tell youuu. :D They're even doing a poem about a hospital. A HOSPITAL! My specialist subject of all things. Rather unfair.

Though saying that, I can stay happy about it. There are plenty of funny memories and quips from before the summer. Like the "When a pupil goes mad" Button... James' plane book...Haha, my distracting plane impressions... The Nuclear Power, War in Iraq, Racism and NHS essays... The Free Stuff Spree, well James' Free Stuff Spree... My silly similes poster... And of course these blogs, they've been great to write and read, so thank you Miss, English was great. :)

[Oh and by the way, Mr Keery has absconded with most of your books including SeaBiscuit. And we pinched your classroom sign. For safe keeping of course.. ;)]

Best wishes, x

Summer Blogging, Grease remake 2070.

2007-07-04T19:08:00.001+01:00

Yes! I'm summer blogging. Here's a brief outline of the story, and why you should all join up too:

Mrs O'Neill suggested we should have a Wikispace which leads to our newly created Summer Blogs where we'll keep an account during the summer of our holidays and other things etc, there will also be Creative Writing included too.

What we need now is new members. So, if you're interested in keeping a blog and like the idea of a Summer one, please contact us via our blogs or the Wikispace and we'll be sure to answer any queries and join you up!

Updates shall follow about any advanced x

Motivate Motivation

2007-07-03T20:53:00.000+01:00

Recently, well today as a matter of fact, I handed in my Personal Study of Daphne du Maurier's 'Rebecca' for English. I loveloveloved writing it, whereas a few people have complained about having to do work only a matter of days before the summer holidays, as I loveloveloved the book. (What a surprise...) I adore writing analytically, especially if its on a piece of text or novel that I enjoyed reading, whether I‘m good at it is a different matter. To be honest, I think you need to like your novel to actually spur yourself into reading into the deeper meanings of it. If that makes sense...?

Let me make myself slightly less jumbled like alphabetical soup, which is yummy by the way.

I'm one of those people who needs a big interest or incentive and added on pressure to actually function properly. For instance, the Int 2 Coursework requirements for Art are that each candidate produces 2 3-A2 sheets, one set for Still Life and the other for Graphic Design. They give both 3rd and 4th year to do this in. Now, me being the lazy so-and-so I am, I left both my final pieces and most of my Still Life Unit un-done up until the last two months, meaning everything was an uber big rush. But I finished it, and it was incredibly better than anything I'd done in the free time limit. Ok, so it took me three hours, one packet of chalks and a helluva big mess to do it in, but it was done and I liked it. Cant say mum was too chuffed about the mess though. Even the dog was techno-coloured. :)

"Motivation such an aggravation,
Accusations dont know how to take them.
Inspirations getting hard to fake it.
Concentrations never hard to brake it.
Situation never what you want it to be." Sum 41, Motivation.

QUOTE OF THE DAY-
"Computers are magnificent tools for the realization of our dreams, but no machine can replace the human spark of spirit, compassion, love, and understanding."
~Louis Gerstner.

Anyway, motivation. I need motivation, and I think we all do in some aspect. If there weren’t deadlines to meet, would we as a nation be able to function? You face deadlines everyday, TV Schedules, Newspaper Deadlines, Doctors appointments and even the more subtle ones like being home in time to watch your favourite TV program. So what motivates people?

Studies show that it is a balance between our emotions and incentives that make us self motivate to complete tasks. The Soul Purpose, a company like The Tree Of Knowledge who specialise in Motivational Workshops state that its rather like dangling a carrot in front of a donkey, which is an excellent way of describing it.

However, this then means that an episode of Casualty, a Peanut butter Kit Kat or Jelly can be used against me. Hmmm… I may have to re-asses my insentives...

'Tis The Season To Be Jolly...

2007-06-22T16:10:00.000+01:00

Admit it, you sang Fah lah lah lah la la lah lah lah after reading the title didn't you? :D

185 Days, 13 Hours.

That's all it is before the halls are decked, the turkeys are stuffed and the house is turned upside down in an explosion of brightly coloured tinsel. Great isn't it? I know its nowhere near the right time to be singing Christmas songs or swapping tales of your family arguments that inevitably happen at the extensive and overcrowded dinner table, but the topic has got me thinking. Or reflecting rather.

On December the 4th, 2000, the Dornan family left Glasgow Airport with the destination 3 hours North East of Britain. Lapland. Being only 8 and 6 at the time meant it was still OK to get over-excited at things and both Glen and myself were extremely excited what with it being the run up to Christmas and my birthday too. Upon arriving in Lapland the first scene was like something taken out of a Christmas Card, with snow covering everything its icy fingers could reach. It was as if we'd left the busy humdrum life of Scotland and entered a world like no other. There were no cars, no bustling shops filled with gift-crazy mothers, no clocks that constantly reminded you that you had to be somewhere else five minutes ago. Nothing. Just pure peace and serenity.

I think that was one of the things I remember, and to this day the memory remains intact as if it were only a few months ago. The feel of the snow when I stepped into it right up to my knees... Watching as my breath lingered in the air like a make-believe tree decoration... Glen and I making snow angels... Battling in snowball fights with our fellow travellers... Catching the look on my mums face when Glen hit her with snowball before she returned fire... the reindeer wandering the trees nearby... magical.

Of course, at the time I wasn't analysing just what was drawing me into the place, but the more I think back on it I can see it in my mind. Every once in a while we all need a break. Whether it be to a hot Mediterranean country or the chilling wilds of Norway, if its a contrast from your home its worthwhile. I don't think anyone would be sane if they stayed in Stranraer for all of time, that would be enough, in the words of many an Academy pupil, 'tae drive a sane man batty.'

The backseat traveller in me feels compelled to say thats its part of Human Instinct to explore and discover not only new places but ourselves in the journey to the destination. Like travelling all the way down to the Cotswolds before you suddenly decided you dislike the car seats and can barely move upon arriving. Or going round Longleat Safari Park in 40'C heat in a car with no Air Conditioning or allowance to open the windows, and realizing you hate the heat but love the sun. Maybe I'm just speaking from past experience but in my opinion the journey that takes you where you're going, is just as important as the getting there.

(I adore travelling. Give me a good book, my Walkman phone and any mode of transport you chose and I'd be happy wherever you sent me. So long as it wasn't James piloting the plane, I've seen his landings, and trust me, the runway ain't fun on one wheel!)

I'm just curious as to what other people think of travelling, what with today's society being given daily reminders of the terrorism atrocities and attacks in recent times. Even though it is a daily commodity we all take for granted, should we pay more attention to the wider effects? Global Warming has been a major cause for concern recently with Britan's Carbon Footprint being discussed on every news forum the world over. Personally, I think even though we need time away and time to ourselves, we should all pay more attention to what our affects will have on future generations. Will Scotland be like it is today? Or will we be all walking around in "Atmospheric Protection Suits" like aliens from a Sci-Fi movie? Or, will we even be here at all? Given enough food and the mind boggles at the possibilities.

Education

2007-06-20T16:38:00.001+01:00

Recently, I have been surveying the Education System from within its very walls, yes, my school. My school isn't perfect, no one in the town would say so but its not exactly terribly bad either. Yes, there a days when if given a shot gun you could shoot yourself silly with the amount of pupils you'd like to eradicate permanently, and then there are also days when you feel like a working part of a huge community, almost like a family. A very estranged, distended and noisy family, but a family nonetheless. (Ok, so I may be exaggerating just a little with the shot gun theory but I'm sure others would agree.)

I had two days just like these not so long ago, it was a Monday and a Tuesday of the same week if I remember correctly. Nothing major happened on the Monday; no big bomb threats or a deliberate setting-on-fire of the library, there was just period after period of disruptive pupils, extreme heating conditions and clueless cover teachers. Added together on a grey, drizzly, typical Scottish Monday did not result in a nice Jemma. The day almost drove me to loose faith in the school completely.

If there is one thing I cant stand is being in a class where I know I have a great deal of work I could be getting on with but due to an illness my teacher hasnt made it in and we get a cover teacher who'd just as happily make us watch endless episodes of The Simpsons. Or, in the case of RME, Wallace and Gromit. I'm most deffinately not blaming it on the teachers or the cover teachers for that matter, its the lack of discipline there is in todays schools and also in many family homes.

Kids are misbehaving, then are not getting punished by the Higher Management according to what they've done. Its either to be put on a timetable (which has mutated into a badge of hounour and a plus 100 points on your Street Cred) or to get a phonecall home. I'm sorry to admit but, say, 10 years ago if your parents got a phonecall from the school, they would immediately ask you what you've done, why you'd done it and get the full story before taking it further and dealing with it. In 2007 however, the immediate parental reaction is to ask the teachers why they have the nerve to call them about their child when their child has done nothing wrong, yet they havent even got the story straight from either side. It is not only setting a bad example and making the kids have no respect for the school, but its also going to affect them in later life, the school is going to become the workplace and teachers are going to become employers and there will be no end in the problems.

Witnessing fellow pupils misbehave in classes, seeing teachers getting stressed out over them and watching as the state of education slides decidedly downwards, I cant help but feel a great deal of pity for the teachers in schools. They not only have the responsibilty of teaching and nuturing you minds, but they aslo have the added pressures of discipline and parents who refused to believe their child is no longer their little angel. I say they deserve more credit than they currently get, dont you?

*I find my opinions on this subject rather ironic as I myself want to be an Art Teacher. :)

Me In A Blogshell.

2007-06-15T22:08:00.000+01:00

Whilst pondering what I could place in my blog and certain topics that will come up over the next few weeks I decided I just get this entry over and done with.

The All About Me Section.

Of course, I don't expect many to read this but just in case someone stumbles across my blog they may as well know a little bit about me. So here goes...

-I'm Jemma, I'm 15 and currently loving English and Art in Stranraer Academy. I like going out in the rain, eating Lemon Curd and watching Casualty. By Jove if I could figure out how to eat Lemon Curd in the rain and watch Casualty at the same time I'd be laughing.
-Other hobbies include writing on here, Bebo (I know its not really a hobby but you'll find me there very often) taking my Guinea Pigs walks, listening to music and keeping in touch with everyone I know in Australia, England and Holland.
-The art side of me is just a pastime but one day in the hazy-but-near future, I'd love to teach it as a subject. Knowing me, it'll change but heyho, cake decorating is my back up. Still Life and Graphic Design are my strong points with hands also but I'd love to get my Portraiture up to scratch. Being in 5th Year and taking 5 Highers doesn't leave you with much free time however, so its on the back burner at the minute.
- School Life isn't too bad at the minute, English and Art are getting me through the weeks quite happily. Mrs ONeill and Mr Nimmo are excellente' and I think that's what makes all the difference. S'awsum! Getting to study the NHS and Daphne du Maurier in English.

FIVE THINGS YOU WONT KNOW ABOUT ME.

1. My name is Jemma. J E M M A. Not Jenna, Heather, James, Gemma or indeed "Glens big sister," thank you very much.

2. I used to do ballet, which then morphed into swimming for the Stranraer Stingrays. Haha.

3. My birthday is the 22nd of December, and to quote my Granny, I "was the best Christmas present" she's ever had. <3

4. I'm totally obsessed with Casualty. Muwhahaha. Its awesome, and its the only thing I watch on TV funnnily enough. Susan Cookson, who plays Dr Maggie Coldwell, is absoloutely amazing and deserves much more credit than she gets. (Strokes ones autograph :P)

5. My favourite author in the world is Daphne du Maurier (in case I havent already told you so, which I highly doubt :P) Its not just the fact that her books are amazing and gothicly romantic, but its also the fact that Daphne herself was such an interesting character. The recent BBC 2 Period Drama 'Daphne' was based around her life and ti was ohso excellente'. I have it on DVD if anyone wishes to watch, it seriously was one of the best Dramas I've viewed in an absolute age.

Update soooon x